FRIENDS I HAVEN'T MET YET

First and foremost, congrats to my Philly girls for coming in at a close second last week at Quizzo. Well, actually, let me congratulate Jill, who is probably the only one from the team who reads this. Walshie, my girl, please be sure to keep me updated on the team names, I find them quite humorous. I don't know why it is that last month we sucked holy balls, but I'm still planning on trying to make Quizzo on the 22nd for the Kennedy round. Remind Jerome, er, Johnny, that he promised there would be a Kennedy round. We shall prevail.

Now onto Buffalo.

Surprisingly, my schedule hasn't been too crazy. For many different reasons, I feel like I haven't been doing much. But I know this will change on Monday when we turn our focus to GOTV and I can actually be a part of the planning process. So until then, I've been told to relax a little. So I shall. In my jacuzzi. When I'm not trying to figure out how I can be useful to this campaign.

I know this will change. I noticed right away the first day that I got here that it was strangely quiet in the campaign office. I hoped it was because everyone was out, knocking on doors, at phone banks. And I'm beginning to wonder. Because all the balls are up in the air, no one seems to know what's happening where or when, and today, I sat at the front desk answering phones while waiting for my canvassers to show up. A handful did. The good news is that we're on fourth or fifth rounds of canvasses and lit drops, so I guess it's not as bad as I think it is. I've been observing and sitting for three days and the guy I'm working with assured me that this is what it was like for him when he got there the week before me. But he's dealing with a death in the family, so he told me that I should see what's happening tomorrow, but assured me that not much would be happening since the Bills are playing tomorrow and nothing happens in Buffalo when football is on. So it looks like I have another day of rest before we get together, piss and moan about lack of communication, come up with our last week plan, and start implementing. I expect to be very busy soon.

But the most interesting thing so far are the random people I've met.

For starters, I forgot that people in Upstate New York have an accent. In Syracuse, it's more nasal. We have really flat vowels. Instead of "I spent time with my ah-nt yesterday" the phrase sounds like, "I spent time with my A-nt yesterday." You get the idea. "I broke the vah-ze" becomes "I broke the vAA-se." And sometimes it borders on Canuck.

West of 'Cuse, folks talk with a weird mix of Canadian and Midwest. Soda is pop out here and I swear at times that I'm in the middle of a Minnesota Toronto, or a Minneonto, if you will. Or even a Torosota. But either way, it's amusing. I just hope I don't pick it up. Because we all know I have a tendency to pick up on accents. Very quickly. But for now, I'm just amused every time I talk to someone here.

I've encountered two very interesting people here that really stick out in my mind.

First, we have Dancing Man. I've seen Dancing Man every day since I've been here - four times in one day, even. I suspect that Dancing Man is homeless or in a shelter as he travels around in the same outfit wielding a plastic bag filled with something every day. I don't like to judge, but that's what I think. Judging by his clothes that are dirty and ragged in places and that his face seems to gather more dirt each time I see him, I have to assume such a theory.

But the thing about Dancing Man is - you guessed it - he's always dancing. Doing ballroom dancing moves and twirling and even some ballerina in him. Yesterday, I saw him do a West Side Story move as he crossed the street. He is completely oblivious to onlookers and seems content to dance to the music in his head. Which, for some odd reason, comforts me. I find him to be not amusing, but somewhat uplifting. No matter where he goes, he's dancing. And this makes me happy. And I know I'll see him everyday, near the campaign office, and run into him at some point. He's like "Where's Waldo" for me every day.

Then there's Antonio. Or Tony. I don't really know.

Last night, I realized at around 8pm that I hadn't eaten all day. I think part of it is the trying to save money thing. Because while I have a jacuzzi in my room, I have no kitchen, no refrigerator, and no microwave. So I have to eat out. I have nary a choice. My hotel is located in a pretty good spot in downtown Buffalo where there's a great coffee shop across the street and bars and eateries all around. So I wandered outside for a spell and wanted something healthy, but I'm around bars and dives and things like that. So I went to Jim's Steak Out, which claims to have the best steak hogie in Buffalo.

But in Buffalo, like in Rome, do what the Buffalonians do. Yes, they're called Buffalonians out here.

So I got wings. Because yes, they do make them damn good out here. And yes, they are different here than other places.

But as I rolled up to Jimmy's, there was another guy in the place. He was all over the place and very clearly, a good-looking gay man. And we all know that I collect gay men like they were baseball cards or even Pogs. Yeah, pulled that one out of my ass.

So he's talking to the girl behind the counter, apparently they all know him there. And he's saying weird things, they're saying he's pretty drunk. And the girl behind the counter goes out back and he takes notice of my presence, still halfway through his conversation with the now dissapeared girl when he suddenly turns to me and was like, "Go ahead, slap my ass."

So i did. Because why not?

And so he introduces himself to me with a curtsy and a kiss on my hand as Antonio. And I realize his eyes are really scary. Because he has these light-almost-white blue contacts in. For Halloween, I assume. I hope. And then we start talking, conversation all over the place, him just flaming all over and me somewhat happy to have made a friend.

While we're waiting for my order, he reaches down to tie his shoe and declares, "Oh, fashion faux pax! I'm wearing white socks with brown shoes." And the girl behind the counter (who has returned) says in response, "You're not doing your community any good if you're dressing like that, aren't you guys supposed to have a superpower fashion sense?" And he commiserates over his faux pas when some girls walk in - you know the type, tube tops, low rider jeans so the whole world's their gynocolygist, and shiny, sparkly bags that looked like they were bejeweled. And he turns to me and says under his breath, "Talk about fashion faux pas." Then he proceeds to talk really loudly in a valley girl voice and we're laughing.

Meanwhile, he's still making me slap his ass. And then he returns the favor. All in good fun.

And the girl behind the counter is like, "You know him?" And I laugh and shake my head no and explain we just met. Then he comes up behind me and slaps my ass and turns around so I can do the same and she's like, "Oh, you know him?"

I was like, "We just had this conversation."

So after much more ass grabbing between the two of us, we go outside while we wait and he tells me more about him. And he keeps telling me I'm just adorable when his friends call and ask him where he is. He tells them he'll meet them down the street in a minute and explains that he met this cutie pie gorgeous girl and then hangs up and decides he's going to hang out with me a little longer. We chat, it's nice. Get to know each other a little bit. Then he takes me back into Jimmy's, I'm getting my food, he gives me a hug and a kiss and then leaves.

I expect I'll run into Tony again, but it was a strange, but nice little point of contact in what would otherwise be a no-contact day. It's strange to be on a campaign, sitting on my ass, feeling like I have nothing to do, sitting in a hotel room by myself - so I felt somewhat happy I ventured out. I don't know why, but it was funny and happy at the same time.

Who says you can't have fun in Buffalo? Even for a moment. At least it was something. If I find time, I'm going to stalk the Righteous Babe headquarters and see if I can get some good stuff before I leave. Hell, I'm in Buffalo. And I really want to check out the Frank Lloyd Wright houses at some point. Watch. I'll get really busy and I won't get a chance. Won't that just be a bitch?

Off to bed to enjoy the extra hour of sleep. Hope you're all doing well, faithful readers.