CROUCHING CONCUBINE, HIDDEN GEISHA

I have finally moved into my apartment in Albany. I need to buy more surfaces before I can finish unpacking, but until then, at least I'm moved in.

But between wrestling with Ikea furniture with the help of one Mad Dog Darby, moving cartons, dealing with ridiculous amounts of packing paper, and trying desperatly not to get a cardboard cut, I've been reading Memoirs of a Geisha since I not only want to see the movie, but Walsh had told me years ago that it was her favorite book and I've been meaning to read it.

Plus, it's the only book not in a box right now. Right.

It really is quite a fabulous book. You learn so much about the Geisha and despite the story breezing through the second World War in Japan, it's still a great read.

But it's in Japan, right?

So doesn't anyone else find it funny that the main women in the movie will be played by Chinese women?

And basically the entire cast of Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon?

I mean, I heart, HEART Michelle Yeoh. And Ziyi Zhang - I anticipate she will have learned English for this movie? Would be fun to see the two of them in a film again where they weren't trying to kill each other with strange weapons. And Ken Wantanabe! I'm very excited for this movie - and not only because it's another chance for a bunch of Asian actors (who are fantastic) to get together.

But let's call it what it is, shall we? I have always strove for proper and clear definitions (well, at least since I was a Coro). So let's call it what it is and give it a proper subtitle:

Memoirs of a Concubine: Adapted from Memoirs of a Geisha, but we couldn't find enough Japanese actors who could play the lead women roles.

Not as misleading and better, ethical marketing. As an Asian, I wouldn't be offended.

HIGHLIGHT REEL:

Okay. So much has happened since I last posted. So to follow in the shoes of Walsh, I will hit the highlights of what hast passed in the past week or so...

1. Frustrated by the moving process (you will see this several times).
2. I spent almost $700 on a hotel room for the Spitzer Fundraiser in NYC. Think that's crazy? He raised $5 million that night.
3. The next night, dropped almost $500 on a different hotel in NYC. But got almost 6,000 points for staying there one night. Whohee!
4. That same night, got the Fighting Painting Monkeys, the Lobby Song, and Pass a Bill song stuck in my head.
5. Later that night, I got two hours of sleep and then Jessica and I left NYC only to be almost killed on the ride home because of the Noreaster that hit last Friday. We did two 360's near exit 13a. Luckily, we weren't hit, nor did we hit the guardrail, we spun over three lanes, and everything was fine. We've been touched by an angel, yo (name the movie line).
6. Friday evening, spent time with the WC kids for SF's birthday. Of course, this meant spending time with Ross, Michael, and Jilly Bear before the event, only to be joined by the fabulous Christine. Five or six short beers, two Boli Stolly's, and a limon shot later, we headed to the party. Where I proceeded to hang out with Elle and the gay boys, Sofa Kingdom, and of course, the WC kids. And included a chocolate cake shot, two Nutty Irishmen, two shots of Jameson, and a shot of SoCoh. And a game of Testicle Tap with all the gay men. Yes, it was as fun and as fabulous and as strange as a drunk night can be.
7. 8:00 am Saturday morning (after going to bed at 4ish), I headed back to NYC with Fabs, Chris, and Chris's roommate, Stevie. Jill couldn't get anyone to cover her shifts at Morimoto. We had a fabulous time.
8. Got to see the Van Gogh drawings at the Met. Awesome.
9. Got to see Ilana and Olivia and Vicki. And Vicki's friend. Who is interesting, to say the least, at karaoke.
10. Got a hug from the Karaoke man for my It's the End of the World (As We Know It)performance. Whoot-whoot!
11. I still miss Lucky's and Lalo. Sigh.
12. And Houston's.
13. And the Union Square Holiday Fair.
14. We had a great time.
15. The movers came to pack my stuff on Monday. The guy who assessed my stuff didn't do a great job of assessing how much work they'd have to do. They were fantastic, though. Just took all day. So all of my stuff got packed. Well, stuff for the most part. There was stuff that they took that I didn't want them to take. And stuff they didn't take that they should have. But it's small stuff enough. They worked hard, though. And they were fantastic guys.
16. I went to see Dave last night with Ooter at the Wachovia Center and we had amazing seats. Fantastic, if you will. I realized I am getting old because we bowed out before the end of the encore to avoid the traffic associated with concerts. I have vowed not to do this again.
17. Went to Quizzo just in time for the last two rounds. Placed 4th. Not too bad, considering that we had won twice in a row. Sofa Kingdom placed 3rd, not too far above us. But seriously, do you know the name of the operation that netted Saddam Hussein? Without googling it? Yeah, thought so.
18. That was my last Quizzo for a while. Tear. I'll just have to find it in Albany. Or start it in Albany. Huh.
19. I move into my new apartment on Saturday.
20. I still have lots to do today.

With that being said, I shall leave you be since I need to leave Delelelel at the butt-crack of dawn to make it into Albany by the 11pm conference call. Sweet Lord.

HELL HAST FROZEN OVER.

I'm sure you thought hell had frozen over when the BoSux won the series last year. Hell, I did, too. And it probably did then. But something momentous has happened.

We won again last night at Quizzo.

We even beat Sofa Kingdom.

Dizzy from our first win, we were excited, but I think the reality is setting in. We kicked their asses.

No 100 point game this time. In fact, it was almost a mirror of last week. With help from Padrino, who finally managed a cameo at our Quizzo game, we got every question right in the first round, including the bonus, to net us 11 points (Dave was instrumental in knowing FSU is playing in the Orange Bowl) and then we totally sucked the second round (50/50 before or after Pearl Harbor round - it was hard) and we only got 4 right for an awesome score of 19 (fourth from last).

Then we were saved.

See, we attributed the first win to Nick and Jessica and Malaysia. This time around, we attribute the win to our alcoholism and Richard Strauss.

We got two questions wrong in the Wild Card Round, but good enough to get us 43 points, good enough for 4th place by the end of the third. The Wild Card Round was alcohol. As if God herself couldn't give us a better topic. We didn't know the breweries in Philly, which is the reason we got two wrong, but we even got the Grappa question.

Then the infamous "Impossible Round" happened and surprisingly, we were feeling pretty strong. After much deliberation as to which President in the 20th century had the shortest tenure (Ford, by the way, and yes, we got it right), he threw us a softball with the 10 point bonus question - and we were only one of two teams to get it right: Which German composer wrote Thus Spake Zarathrusta, made famous by the movie 2001 Space Oddessey? I think Fab and I almost fell out of our seats.

Strauss, by the way. Not Wagner. Which is what everyone else guessed. Finally! All those years of being a classically trained violinist pay off! Granted, it was Quizzo, but whatever!

So with one wrong in the round, but still with the 10 pointer, we got a whopping 50 points to bring our score up to 93. We figured we had at least placed in the top three.

Then Johnny says that there was a pretty serious race for the top three. We're like, no way, we might have a chance at 2nd. Then he tells everyone to give a hearty boo to this week's winners, I Went to College With Prince Humperdink's Daughter. We found our name funny.

Total upset. We won by 7 points. Over two top teams that usually win or place first or second - one being the infamous Sofa Kingdom. Sure, there were only two of their members there, but we still took it from them.

And thus hell froze over again. Now onto the Three-Peat. Though I won't be there next week. Mama's seeing DMB with Ooter.

I would also like to take this opportunity to plead with Maury Povich: PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE DO A DIFFERENT SHOW BESIDES "WHO'S YOUR DADDY?" IT IS GETTING OLD. If I may make a suggestion, he sometimes breaks from the usual paternity tests to do makeovers. He might start with offering to fix the teeth of his many guests.

I know this is mean. But honestly. It's worse than an English Pub in there. I had to change the channel. Besides the fact that I'm tired of the concept.

I also realize that my last two posts have been Quizzo-related. Lots of people have been like, how's the move? Next question. It's complicated and annoying and frankly, I'm going out of my mind. So Quizzo it is.

But look out! The next post will be NYC related. The Philly Phabulous girls and I will be hitting the city this weekend. Hard. I'm sure something rather amusing will come of it.

Unless a rant comes first. But I dunno that will happen.

In the meantime, spay and neuter your pets. Monkey, out!