THE MOST ANNOYING QUIZZO EVER

This story goes out to my Philly Chicas.

I'm all about making new friends. One time, a lady on a plane asked if we knew each other because I looked very familiar. When I replied no, she answered, "Well, that's okay. I have friends I haven't met yet." Nice sentiment.

I'm saying this because last night, we decided to schedule a Quizzo night since I'm leaving for Albany on Tuesday (got the confirmation).

So by the time Jill and I got there after viewing Elizabethtown - much better than the critics have said it is - we found Megan and Christine at a table with two people we didn't know. Turns out there was no other available table and instead of leaving after dinner, these folks decided to stay and wanted to play Quizzo on our team. Okay.

So after yet another "_insert celebrity/sports figure/random person name_ is best friends with my second cousin!" team name, we settled in for a game of Thursday night Quizzo, hoping to better our below average placements as of late.

Let me stop here to explain the team names. We used to be "Honk if you Heart Butt-Sex," a name not so much vulgar as funny because it's related to a very funny story. But we weren't doing so good with the name. One of the times we came in 3rd, our name was "Please Hammer Don't Hurt 'Em." After more amusing names that bordered on embarrassing personal stories and running out of embarrassing moments to create the names, a few weeks ago, Jill blurted out, "My second cousin is best friends with George Clooney!" And finding this funny, we made it our team name. Needless to say, team names after have all been on this theme, including: "Babe Ruth is my second cousin!", "George Clooney dated my aunt!" (another Jill gem), "My second cousin won the chess championship in Atlana when he was twelve!", "Nancy Kerrigan is my best friend's second cousin!", and "The Olympic Bronze medalist for Ice Dancing is my second cousin!" You get the idea. I'm waiting for "I once stood behind Seth Green in line at a deli!" to come up.

Back to the story...

So these two people are very nice - one guy, one girl. We make friends. We go through the first round of Quizzo. The guy keeps giving us bad answers, though he was right about one of them. He's a very close talker. Very intense, you know, with the non-blinking eye contact. But he's harmless enough. And drunk. The girl, on the other hand, is sweet as can be and chatting up a storm with us. We're cool.

Now the entire time, the four of us are thinking these two are together. They have good body language, leaning in to chat, smiling at each other the whole time, you know. After a while, it becomes clear that the four of us are playing and the other two are watching with mild amusement, mostly wondering how we knew Bella Lugosi was the answer to one of the questions. The girl is really trying to be very helpful. The guy is drunk, blurting out wrong answers, and then decides to disappear for a while. Which is fine. We girls bond over the next two rounds of Quizzo.

I should mention that Christine has three packs of cigarettes in front of her and Megan and Jill were allowing these friends to bum cigarettes off of them. Very communal that way. We're nice people.

All of a sudden, some random chick who's very drunk comes over to Chris and asks to bum a cigarette. True believers in cigarette karma (as the above implies), she graciously offers one to the girl, who, intense herself, strikes up a conversation with Chris. It's polite and nice, you know, the kind when meeting new people. All of a sudden, out of nowhere, the guy comes back and he steps in to talk to the chick.

What we understand is that she's been playing Quizzo with some friends of hers at the bar. And we quickly turn our attention to the third round, kicking ass, I might add. So us five girls - me, Jill, Chris, Megan, and new girl friend are playing along while the dude and the random cigarette bummer (I'll call her CB) are talking. No big deal.

So we find out the girl and the guy live in the building together or go to school together or something like that. And she says after the third round that she has to leave soon because she's got class in the morning. She decides to stay for the last round, but decides afterwards to peace out. She tells us that she's happy she met us and would it be okay for her to come next Tuesday for Quizzo and the girls proceed to tell her it will be great, especially since I'm not going to be there, they'll be a person down anyway, blah blah blah. She leaves and we're happy to have met her.

As she does, she has to interrupt the guy and CB and tells him she's leaving, he hugs her, tells her he'll talk to her later and she leaves with the, "love you" line.

We're sort of confused.

Then again, I have some good guy friends who end conversations with me like that, too. So okay. We thought they were together. Now we find out they aren't. Fine. Whatever.

I should mention that at this point the way we were sitting. Here's a diagram - I'm procrastinating, okay? And a set designer. This is what I do.



Megan left after the third round. So Jill, Megan, and me found ourselves the sole players on the team remaining. In the meantime, CB and Dude move over to the table. Which is fine. Except that if you look carefully at the diagram above, we were pressed for space to begin with and we were in a small area.

So it ended up looking like this:



Now, this will come across as mean, but why not go back to her table? Hmm? Obviously they were in their own world. Except that this girl had the voice that reminded you of nails on a chalkboard. And she talked loud. And a lot. I've already mentioned he was a close talker.

You know where this is going.

So as we tried to listen to the last questions over her annoying voice and his loud drunk one, we found ourselves getting annoyed and frustrated.

And because of the way we were sitting, we couldn't engage in meaningful conversation.

The conversation stopped between the three of us as we couldn't help but listen to their conversation, passing notes to each other like we were in school, laughing at the situation and conveying all of this through our eyes and looks at each other. Over the course of a month, we've learned how to read each other's faces. And so we were kind of amused, but really really annoyed at the same time.

Wanna know what they were talking about? Well, she was going on and on about Ovid and how "beautiful" it is to be educated, what she learned at Columbia, how "beautiful" her education was, how she's fluent in French, how her father is an ophthalmologist and "likes eyeballs", her childhood, how fantastic ancient literature is.

And on and on.

And he was leaning in, touching her at times as he responded to her with, "I'm sorry, I've just never met anyone so passionate as you." Puhlease.

She kept going on about fine art, how "beautiful" it is, how she doesn't get modern art, and more things that made us want to poke our eyeballs out of our eye sockets with the pen and throw them across the table at them.

He tried to respond equally educated about his experience at Penn before she started going on about doing really well on the LSAT and how she got into law school and she just didn't know, there were so many "beautiful" things out there she was so into and not sure about going to law school.

By the way, this all takes place in the span of a half hour. I've never seen a pickup meeting go in so many different directions at once, mostly because she had verbal diarrhea.

During all of this, we were trying hard not to be obvious with our displeasure, but found it difficult to sustain any sort of conversation with this chick yammering on.

We instead focused on chugging our beers and getting the hell out of there.

Chris got up to go to the bathroom and the dude reached over to her cigarette box (she smartly put away the extras) and finding it empty, picked up Jill's pack and proceeded to give one to the chick and one for himself before taking her lighter to light them.

Um.

This was fine when he was actually talking to us. Now that he had spent the last two hours listening to her in hopes of bringing her home, we weren't feeling as gracious as we had before.

AND THEN she starts yammering about The Trojan Women and explaining to him the story. I'm slightly amused because this is all about sex. In The Trojan Women, to stop a war the women felt were unjust, they withhold sex from their husbands to earn world peace. In a nutshell. And she's going on and on about a woman's place and how the men make the decisions, so they are doomed to fail, blah blah blah. At which point, I started getting angry. But then she cuts off that thought by saying, "That Aristophanes was amusing. And a great read." He starts telling her how he's reading French literature from the 1800's, which she finds appalling, exclaiming how much she hates that literature. Now Jill and I have both taken TM's Ancient Greek and Roman Theatre class (or whatever it's called) and we're just highly amused at her critique of that amusing Aristophanes. BECAUSE EURIPIDES, NOT ARISTOPHANES, WROTE THE TROJAN WOMEN.

Now we're running for the door. The only thing we say to them as we leave is Chris asking for her jacket that the Dude has been sitting on for the last two hours. We leave without another word. We get to the door and once on the other side, start laughing and saying how annoying the last two hours were.

As I drive away, I see the dude walking with her, taking her home. I call Chris and Jill. And we laugh and say, "well, that was the most ridiculous pickup I've ever seen. And we saw it all."

That, my friends, was the most annoying Quizzo we've ever sat through. From here on out, we're just going to have to get there at 9:30 to get our own table. Never again.

Oh, and by the way, this guy is still a douchebag. And is it just me, or does he look like Sloth from The Goonies?


I fucking hate Tom DeLay. I rarely use that kind of profanity on this blog, but the Christ, I can't stand him.

Right. Off to finish up this work.

Yes, I have been extremely wayward in my blogging duties.

For the few of you who actually read this, I have decided to forego my blogging of the trip to the Brown land. Why? Because the next few days are extremely depressing posts detailing my fathers funeral and for now I'd like to stay out of therapy and subject all of you to it - no "Read my pain!" blogs right now. I know I will need some sort of therapy somewhere down the road for all the shitstorms I've faced in my life, but I have to remember that few of you are licensed therapists and after the trauma of the past few months, I need to pay all of you and my incredible support group and frankly, I don't have that kind of dough. Besides, I need something to talk to my future therapist about.

So some of you might actually say, "But why, Monkee, I've been very interested in your stories from the homeland?!" And I will answer, yes, someday I will scribe stories about the Philippines that will make you laugh and cry. But not today.

Things have been very hectic for me out here in the past few weeks. But there's big news: I HAVE A NEW JOB. Effective sometime they unclog the papers from the hopper in AFSCME Land. Those AFSCME employees who read this know what I mean. Basically, my old boss got a new job in DC and they needed someone to replace her. And I was the lucky one. So I expect in the next few days to be shuffled off to Buffalo (I've always wanted to say that, sort of) to work on the Mayor's race.

Right. I didn't actually tell you what I was going to be doing.

Basically, I'm moving to Albany. I'm still with AFSCME and this is a great position for a New Yorker like myself. I'll still be working on campaigns and doing the talking with legislators thing, except I get a fancy new title, pay raise, a hell of a lot more stability, a home base, and traveling mostly around my home state and the state I love the best (Maryland is a close second). So I'm excited for the new opportunity and to get back to the place I know very well and keep fighting the man.

Speaking of...

I've been busy because last week was a big week of activity for us left-of-center kids. So in usual Keeza fashion, I'm reclaiming my soapbox. I promise it won't be long. Too long, anyway.

See, with Katrina hitting the Gulf Coast and finally some honest discussion about the differences in economics (i.e. Poor People in this country who were left to fend for themselves during one of the worst hurricanes in history), we at AFSCME and other like-minded groups are rallying around the country to push the House and Senate to stop their assault on low-income and hard-working families with further budget cuts to essential programs such as food stamps and Medicaid and fighting against the $70 million in tax cuts to the wealthiest 2% of Americans.

Hi, I've been speechwriting for a week. Can you tell?

So we planned big "Speak-Out" events in targeted states across the country and AFSCME found members in Louisiana affected by the storm and these Katrina survivors agreed to travel across the country to tell their stories. It was amazing.

So we had this awesome survivor up in Delaware for a week - we had the luxury of spending lots of time with Michele. And finding her a wonderful and positive person, we felt okay to ask her some questions about Katrina and what happened, etc.
I found my Coro interview skills well at hand spending time with her. I found out some really important information about what actually happened on the ground out there. And it's the story we aren't hearing.

Before I actually get up on the soapbox to shake my fist at the Administration and Republican Leadership, I'm saving that for the next post. Let's just say that after last week and finding some free time on my hands ironing my laundry from two months, I've been watching a lot of Bill Maher.

Instead, I choose to impart this knowledge from Michele directly to you and then next post, I'll get into the usual ranting and raving. Mmmmkay?

So we took Michele to lunch and as usual, got on the topic of politics and the right. This was where we started asking the good questions. Here's what she told us:

1. Yes, the Administration and FEMA are definitely at fault. But the folks in Louisiana who were there will also give lots of criticism to the Mayor and the Governor. There's plenty of blame to go around. The folks in "power" in New Orleans made bad decisions and the President was too busy clearing bush on his ranch to be bothered. They all know this and they will be the first to say that blame starts with the Mayor of New Orleans, the Governor of Louisiana, the President of the United States, and FEMA. There's no other way to look at it. No blame can be assigned to one party or the other. Tragedies of this kind are usually the fault of many people failing to react in the proper ways.

2. Many people who stuck around New Orleans weren't just too lazy or too poor to get out of town. Many of them had reasons for staying, amongst them: family members in the hospital, entire lives wrapped around their homes, and the obvious: by the time they realized how bad it was going to be, it was too late. And here's where it becomes the problem of economic divide - people didn't have the means to get out quick enough before it hit. Nor were the resources available for them to leave.

3. The Mayor and Governor decided not to use all the school buses at their advantage. By the time the storm hit, the buses were under several feet of water and couldn't get out. So all those people who might have had a chance were never given a choice.

4. The day after Katrina hit and the levees broke, the water was rising rapidly - something we have all heard. But by this time, Army trucks had already started going around. At the point Michele saw them, she was up to her chest in water (and she's tall) and her and her husband were on top of their SUV, calling out to the folks in the trucks to come and help them. And get this: their answer was, "Sorry, we're not allowed to do that."

I'll just let that one sit for a minute.

5. The helicopters were only rescuing folks one at a time, unlike what their actual capacities can handle, which is drop a net and get several people to safety quickly. Why? No one really knows or understands, but the process was extremely slow and could have been much quicker (this is information we probably all know, but hearing it from someone on the ground confirms it).

I'm trying to remember all of the stuff, but here's the most fascinating and in my mind, egregious one:

6. Think this whole "poor" discussion about Katrina is bull? When the Army Corps was deciding which levees to blow up to alleviate the problem of the rising water and to let the water out, they made an interesting choice. Now many of us were relieved to hear that the French Quarter was not badly damaged. BECAUSE THEY MADE A CONSCIOUS DECISION, NOT BECAUSE IT IS ON HIGHER GROUND. Instead of blowing the levee above the French Quarter to help drain the water, they opted for the levee below it. The problem is the levee below it was keeping a lot of water out of East New Orleans, known as a very poor part of town. They made the decision to blow the lower levee, causing the water to flow out and further damage the area of town where they knew a majority of folks who didn't get out of town were. So in case you're unsure: INSTEAD OF SACRIFICING THE FRENCH QUARTER TO FURTHER DAMAGE AND PROBABLY SAVE MORE LIVES AND POSSIBLY PROPERTY, THEY DECIDED TO INSTEAD FURTHER DAMAGE THE FOLKS HARDEST HIT BY THE STORM AND LET THEM FEND FOR THEMSELVES.

I am not making any of this up. I know that the situation down there was dire and terrible, but looking at the decision-making process, one has to start asking some serious questions. Because I promise you, if this was Beverly Hills, or an affluent suburb of Michigan, I seriously doubt these decisions would be different. The difference would be that those folks who had the money would have been gone and they would have saved Rodeo Drive and wiped out Compton instead. I realize they're not in the same area, but you know what I mean.

It's like when they were cutting the budget in New York after 9/11 and got rid of the twice a week garbage pick ups in parts of Manhattan. Where did they cut the trash pickup from two to one first? Spanish Harlem, Washington Heights, and parts of Harlem, USA. Basically anywhere the minorities and poorer New Yorkers live in neighborhoods. I asked then if such decision making was right and I ask again now.

And with the President and leading Republicans so good at the spin game, pointing the fingers and moving the discussion from poverty to "rebuilding" and "economic development" is it not hard to see what their plans are actually going to do? If the President has his way and creates these "economic zones" and "development zones" in rebuilt New Orleans, what happens to the 9th Ward (the Democratic stronghold in a mostly lower-income area)? What happens to the people who have had land in New Orleans from the sharecropping days handed down to them by generations of family who are technically just above the poverty line (a line they keep moving down to empirically state that poverty is on the decline)? They won't be able to afford "rebuilt New Orleans" at all, will they? And where do they go?

Katrina offers us a chance to make things better and to fix the problems. It shed light on the most stubborn residues of racism - economic inequality. And because of the turn in discussion, it was the shortest attention to poverty in this crazy 24-hour news cycle. I know it's depressing to talk about such things, but it is our biggest chance in decades to have an honest discussion about it.

And it shames me to know that it's already slipped many of our minds. Because we all know too well what happens when our attention moves from an honest discussion about poverty to Tomkitten.

I think it's up to all of us who really want change next year to fight to keep it in the forefront. We've got another storm approaching soon and can we please finally talk again about Global Warming? The President and the Republican leadership are finally getting slammed. When Ann Coulter (who is a man) and Andrew Sullivan say they can't trust the president again, we gotta push the issue. And we need to find the right voices to do it - I'm not afraid to pick fights with my own party here, either.

It's time to step to the plate, friends. And not let them forget it.

Oh. And Tom Cruise is gay, anyway. This whole Tomkitten thing was said best by SF this evening: "Either Katie Holmes is about to have an alien anti-christ child or it's gonna come out looking like Chris Klein because she's just Tom's beard." 'Nuff said. Let's get it off the front page now. And get back to the things that really matter.

Back soon to get on the soapbox, I'm just getting started.

That wasn't so long, was it?

Take care of yourselves. And each other.

I know I said I'd blog every day. But after such lengthy posts, I decided that my loyal readers needed some time to digest my posts. So I decided to wait for a little before continuing my stories from the Land of Brown.

That and my dsl line at home is down until tomorrow when the technician will come and fix it sometime between 12 and 4pm. Yeah. My ass. Chances are, they'll show up at 4:30. Neat.

I would like to take a quick second to display my joy and affection for my Bronx Bombers - all of those "Yankee Fans" who told me they sucked all year and that they wouldn't survive to the post-season can kiss it. I had no doubts. My boys play in October. Few things are more certain than that. In the meantime, I know I can at least enjoy another week of Yankee watching, one of my favorite pasttimes in the world.

Now. Lest I forget that I have a mission here, I shall regale you will more stories from the Philippines. Before I do, instead of posting one picture or several at a time, click on the link below to see pics of my homeland. You can also find these pics on a lick on the right.

PICTURES FROM THE PHILIPPINES


Without further ado:

SEPTEMBER 12, 2005 (US, MONDAY)
LOCATION: MANILA TRAFFIC
TIME: 1150 AM, MANILA; 11:50 PM, NEW YORK (SEPTEMBER 11)

I forgot about the traffic. But we've already covered this.

Today my mother, my uncle, my aunt, and I (and some other assorted random family members) have to go to the cemetary to make all of the arrangements.

As we drive along, I take stock of my surroundings.

Besides the traffic, I have forgotten about the poverty here. (Check the pictures link to see what I mean)

Well, I should be honest. It's difficult to forget. From the time I was three, the faces and eyes of countless Filipino men, women, and children have remained in my memory as they begged me on street corners, staring into our stopped car, staring at us with hands outstretched.

Driving along the way, I am struck by the shabby, corrugated cardboard, tin, and wood scraps making up the walls of shacks. Spaces are left between them for windows, stacked one on top of the others, clothes hung out to dry from wire between the windows, families sitting on top of their shacks on what looks to be a very thin tin.

I started thinking about my uncle's house that I was staying at. How big, how modern, how beautiful. And I'm seeing these people, living in filth, amongst rats and dire poverty. And I start to feel helpless.

I can't help but remember a thought I had when I was eight and I visited: "This is the face of poverty. So many of my friends would never believe this exists." I'm looking at the same sight - sitting smack across the street from mansions and businesses that have grown around them. Manila is easily the ugliest city in the Philippines - and because they haven't planned the city as nicely as they could have. I remember thinking then the same thing I'm thinking now: "There are people who live like this in the U.S. But so many Americans don't know. This is what we as a people are missing - the forgotten people who are forced to live like this." I don't feel any better.

They say things in the Philippines won't change for at least 20 years. Besides new buildings, I've noticed it has been the same since I remember coming.

Here, the rich get richer, the poor live in shacks but have cards and pirated flat-screens. The government is corrupt and there hasn't been anything really new since Marcos was in power. I see my homeland suffering from these consequences and the mindset and I am even more upset.

I can start to make comparisons now, but I'll wait until I return to the states and digest all of this first.

I can sum all of this up by saying and asking: The country of my family must rise anew before anything changes. And the country of my birth also needs to wake up. It seems that everyone has much work to do. But who will be the ones brave enough to take on that task? Where have all the leaders gone?

Welcome to my blog if you're just joining us from other sites in your surfing. Or boredom. I care not which.

I have added a new link to the list on the right - shot out to the Colonel.

In the meantime, I shall continue blogging my experiences from the Philippines. If you didn't already know, the post previous to this one is the plane ride from Philly to Manila in all it's glory. I shall continue where I left off. I promise you, this stuff is worth reading if you don't know what to do with yourself for a small period of time.

DATE: SEPTEMBER 11, 2005 (US, SUNDAY)
LOCATION: UNCLE JUN'S HOUSE, CORINTHIAN HILLS, MANILA, PHILIPPINES
TIME: 725 AM, MANILA (SEPT. 12); 725 PM, NEW YORK (SEPT. 11)

I am sort of confused about what day it is since I'm 12 hours ahead of the states, so I'm trying to keep it all straight in my head.

I am fully aware of what day it is in New York City, however. Trust me, this observation did not sit lightly with me. But in the midst of other emotional priorities, it got stirred up in the mix.

Yesterday, I was awoken by two children bounding into my room loudly.

After being jumped on, bounced upon, they proceeded to pepper me with questions such as: "Do you know how to play chess? Checkers? Scrabble?"

At which point, my 8 year old cousin left the room only to return and plop the games down on my bed. She then declared I was "so big" and then proceeded to house me in a game of checkers where she broke all the rules and I took no time at all pointing that out to her.

I should take a moment to explain something. Here, in the Philippines, if you aren't a stick, you are big. Now I realize that under normal circumstances, I could easily spend a week living off the fat of the land. But here, more than in the US, it's about appearance - if you can fathom such a thing being true. But it really is. Body type is all they talk about here, us Filipinos are supposed to be small-boned, slight, and with long hair - all attributes that fall a few yards by me. So it's something you come to expect. I literally could step off the plane at 100 lbs and they'd be like, "Did you put on weight?" And honestly, this really doesn't bother me in the least, I don't give a rat's ass. But since my little cousin thought it would be fun to keep harping on the fact, I am doing my best to preserve my intent by telling you the story as-is.

Right.

Back at the ranch...

I have been wanting to play Scrabble for months since I played at the Astoria Beer Garden the last time I was in NYC for Coro's New York at Nite - and yes, we went to a beer garden and played Scrabble, what's your point?

But I more than made up for it. I played seven games or something like that today. By the second one, I was tired. By the seventh, I was silly stupid.

And bypassing the fact that my cousin cheats, which I let her do until the fourth game where it became rather wearing, I won all the other games. Yes, she's eight. No, she doesn't speak English fluently. But tell me what you would do when your seven letters are: "Y", "I", "O", "I", "O", "A", and "E"? It sucks when all you get are vowels or consonants.

I'm pretty tired from jet-lag and Scrabble. Bed looks good right about now...

Cheers,
Keeza

I have finally returned from the motherland. And I found myself in an interesting position as I seemed to have contracted a stomach virus.

Not neat.

I was in the hosptial for a few hours to get rehydrated and now I'm finally feeling better three days later.

But that's neither here nor there.

I had hoped to blog every day of my trip. I kept a journal. One of those nice moleskin ones (thanks for the advice, Mad Dog).

But the internet isn't so great on that side of the pond. So in all it's glory, here is my journal from the past two weeks. I will post every day until I finish my travel log. Then it will be back to the regularly scheduled program. Trust me, there's just too much fodder for me not to blog this. So without further ado...

TRAVEL DAY: SEPTEMBER 9, 2005 (US)
LOCATION: SOMEWHERE OVER CANADA. LAKE SUPERIOR?
TIME: 545 AM, JAPAN; 445 PM, NEW YORK

I forget how much I enjoy travel, regardless of the circumstances under which I travel. At this point, after such a difficult month, I have decided that I should take my amusement when it comes and make no apologies for it. I figure that the least I can do is be fully aware in all moments - good, bad, funny, annoying. Hell, that's life after all.

Take, for instance, my utter amusement and delight at discovering that beer and wine on international flights, unlike domestic ones, are free of charge.

Here I sit, feet propped up on the empty seat between my mother and I - turned sideways for maximum comfort - with a Miller Lite in my hand, ice cold, and at 6am Philippines/Japan time.

My mother is actually the one who supplied me with the free drink information after an entire morning of my cousin, Ailieen, and I joking about needing a drink, but that it was probably too early in the morning to start.

I'm not going to lie to you. We weren't joking. At least I know I've been dreaming of an ice cold beer since last week. Aileen has been saying we need a drink after the two weeks that we've had.

After my joy of realizing that the drinks were, indeed, free, I caught my mother's eye for a split second. A fleeting thought entered my mind: "Does she think I'm an alcoholic?"

My answer comes quickly from a different part of my mind: "You deserve it, it's free, and besides, when in Rome..."

Then I quickly wonder if this is the part of my brain that gets me in trouble.

Before I can contemplate ways to isolate this particular region of my cerebrum, I am snapped back to reality by the feeling of extreme clausterphobia as I get clocked in the head by the reclining seat directly in front of me.

I swear to god, if she could recline any further, she'd have her head in my lap. And you know why I wouldn't mind for a quick second? Because it's the perfect angle to punch her in the neck.

Well, not really. That's really rather violent of me, isn't it?

I should mention at this point that I am only on my second hour of this leg of the trip. And it's 19 hours long. And if I'm taking stock, I've had one beer, a dinner of chicken, shrimp salad, a roll, beans, and a brownie - nothing to write home about, by the way, and I've already been clocked in the head. I'm halfway through the David Sedaris book I started this morning and I'm afraid that taking out the tarot cards will offend the delicate sensibilites of the majority of Asians that make up this plane's demographic.

And I have another 17 hours to go. I wonder if my mom would worry if I ordered another beer - oh wait, this isn't a boring baseball game where I can drink the innings faster. Dammit.

On the other hand, there's that region of my brain again...

Ow.

Bitchslapped by the seat again. That's it, I'm walking around. Craptasm!

TRAVEL DAY: STILL SEPTEMBER 9, 2005 (US, FRIDAY)
LOCATION: SOMEWHERE OVER SOME PROVINCE IN CANADA
TIME: 650 AM, JAPAN; 550 PM, NEW YORK

Okay. I'm wondering what part of Canada I'm currently over when I was struck by a thought:

I'm not the only one who giggles when I hear Saskatchewan, am I?

Or even better: Manitoba!

Hee hee!

Okay. Seriously. Stop looking at me like that. I've been on a plane for forever.

Fine. I'm walking around again.

TRAVEL DAY: SEPTEMBER 10, 2005 (US, SATURDAY)
LOCATION: I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA. SOMEWHERE NEAR JAPAN?
TIME: 520 PM, JAPAN; 420 AM, NEW YORK

I love how they try to simulate "morning" on a plane. They turn the lights on full - forcing people to open their eyes and squint as the stewardess asks: "eggs or rice?"

Assuming I'm close to Asia, I opt for the rice.

I, however, have mostly been awake. They turned off the lights not long after I last wrote.

I seem to think it's been daylight outside the windows since we left Detroit. Seriously. One guy close to me has had his flap up and it's been light the whole time. That's unnatural, right? Makes me wonder if we're just circling around.

At some point since my last writing, they've shown four movies, including "Monster In-Law" which isn't even listed as one of our available movies. I'm hoping they follow suite with "Mr. and Mrs. Smith" - we're not supposed to have that, either.

Of course, my viewing pleasure would be better enhanced if there wasn't an abnormally tall Asian man with spiky hair blocking 40% of the screen. I tried moving my head slightly, but have you ever seen someone start to fall asleep? Their head rolls around like a bladder on a stick, as Eddie from Ab Fab would say. This man falls asleep like this - but only when there's a movie on. I got neck cramps from moving my head around so much. As I write now, there's no movie on, so his head is still. Craptasm.

By the way, I assume breakfast tastes better without the headrest in front of you included. This woman has been sleeping since we took off. She'll be pretty jetlagged once we hit Nagoya.

Boy, I really got lucky with the passengers in front of me. I'm putting money down that after we refuel in Nagoya, my experience will be better for the final leg of this journey.

I've given up trying to figure out how much longer we have. At some point hours ago, it was useless. It became unfathomable for me to comprehend the time I've spent on this plane. It's like someone claiming that they have a gazillion dollars and daring you to count it all. What's the point? I know my ass will be here for a while - I'd rather not count down the hours because after two, it's like watching paint dry.

I'm forcing myself to stay awake now for at least the next 60-70% of the the remainder of this trip. I probably already had a decent night's sleep - at least 5 hours. But it seems that I've been awake longer than anyone in this section. I know I was awake hours before they were. It doesn't surprise me, really, since I barely get sleep when I'm actually on land.

Night owl that I am, maybe this will be good for me. Normal hours for me instead of jetlagged. Murphy's law would reverse this. Chances are...

In the meantime, some reading while waiting for an available bathroom seems to be in order. Honestly, can we get another bathroom for the 19 hour flight? I've been waiting for hours...

TRAVEL DAY: STILL SEPTEMBER 10, 2005 (US, SATURDAY)
LOCATION: NAGOYA, JAPAN
TIME: 750 PM, JAPAN; 650 AM, NEW YORK

I heart Japan. I need to leave the airport first before I can declare that, I know. But hell, it's true. Judging by this airport, I know I'd love it.

Mai's right: everything here is cute and strangely disturbing at the same time. Like the hand dryers in the bathroom. Fantastic. I can't even describe it except to say that instead of the dryer being above your hands, it's like a cutout. You put your hands in it and it dries both sides of your hands with a powerful gust of warm air. That's the stuff. I was more disturbed by the sight attached to it that read: "Feel funny on the airplane? Nausea, headache, fever, chills, aches? Go to the Health Counsel's office NOW!"

I'm wondering how seriously people take that. I started thinking about whether or not I felt any of it on the plane. I started getting worried that I had. Then I started getting worried I hadn't.

Then I remembered that I'm not a hypochondriac.

I picked up a state-of-the-art digital camera that's more advanced than the ones we have here and cost just shy of $400. I figure it's not too bad. Then again, my mother bought it, but whatever. I'm excited. I also picked up something that said vitamin juice and "coffee shot" which promises to keep me up all day or something. Both for 220 Yen or basically just under $2 - when I pay $6 for a Starbucks tall. Sigh.

Everything here is also orderly and clean which seems exactly the kind of an environment an anal-retentive monkey like myself would feel at home in.

Oooh. Time to board the plane. More later.

P.S. I mention the camera because soon this trip will resemble the widely unfamous "Tales from the Trail" blog I started last year during the Presidential race - meaning you'll get a picture or more on the posts. Something to look forward too?

TRAVEL DAY: STILL SEPTEMBER 10, 2005 (US, SATURDAY)
LOCATION: SOMEWHERE BETWEEN JAPAN AND MANILA
TIME: 815 PM, JAPAN; 715 AM, NEW YORK

My mother just turned to me to ask me who keeps farting.

I just woke up from sleep. I don't know. Nor can I smell passed gas.

She crinkles her nose into a sour puss face.

"Well someone has been farting since we took off, I can smell it."

Knowing her sense of smell, I don't doubt it. Confident that it's not me, I go back to sleep.

TRAVEL DAY: STILL SEPTEMBER 10, 2005 (US, SATURDAY)
LOCATION: ABOUT TO LAND IN MANILA, PHILIPPINES
TIME: 1030 PM, MANILA; 1030 AM, NEW YORK

I cannot decide whether or not I like the map shown on the screen to indicate where we are, where we have traveled thus far, and how close we are to our destination.

Partly because like I said earlier, after 19 hours, the plane doesn't look like it's moving on the map at all. It is like watching paint dry.

On the other hand, it is nice to see how close we are to Manila. Yet, I can't decide if I like knowing that in times of turbulence (and we've had them) that I have a choice between landing on what looks to be a mountain range or somewhere in the sea. Morbid thoughts, I know, but honestly, after that past month, these thoughts come. At least it gives me time to figure out whether to reach above for the masks that will fall or my seat cushion that will act as a floatation device in cases of emergency. Preparation is key.

Oh, we solved the mystery. The man in the seat in front of me is the flatulator. Thank god my sinuses are acting up.

But not that bad. He stood up to stretch and I almost passed out.

My mother and I laughed.

TRAVEL DAY: SEPTEMBER 11, 2005 (US, SUNDAY)
LOCATION: UNCLE JUN'S HOUSE AT CORINTHIAN HILLS, MANILA, PHILIPPINES
TIME: 330 AM, MANILA; 330 PM, NEW YORK (SEPTEMBER 10)

Wide awake. La la la. I feared this.

Ninoy Aquino Airport only seems to have one bathroom. And it's not by any gate. You have to go through customs first, wait in the long line, then walk another football field length to get to baggage claim before you finally can use the bathroom. Neat.

So we got in hours ago after our arrival. As soon as we stepped outside, I started sweating. Just a sign of things to come.

I will also now mention the legendary traffic in Manila. Imagine the bottleneck going into the Holland Tunnel during rush hour. The LIE on a weekend in the summer. The Chesapeake Bay Bridge going to Ocean City in July. Boston when they started the Big Dig. DC jammed with lots of tourists not knowing where to go. Los Angeles traffic during... well, at anytime. But with road closings.

Have that awful scene in your head?

Now throw them all together, take out sensical rules of the road, seatbelt laws, and lane markers. Now you have Manila traffic. See a space? Go with it. See a red light? Run it. See that guy in front of you as you exit a parking lot? He'll move. Jesus, I forgot I have a heart attack everytime I get into a car here.

And it wasn't even busy on the roads when we left. Oy.

But this time, I think I have the cajones to try my hand at driving here.

Well, at least outside of Manila. In my mother's province. Where road traffic is limited to motorcycle tricycles, kids on bikes, chickens, and goats.

The smell of Manila is distinct. The air is heavier. And hotter. And the minute you step outside, you know you're home.

My uncle's brand-new house is absolutely gorgeous. It's huge. It has big-planked wood floors, marble on the first floor, state-of-the-art bathrooms (I should remind myself to tell you about bathrooms in the Philippines in general in a later post), and air conditioning. And I'm extremely happy about that.

But I will attempt some sleep now. I'm starting to get tired. More adventures tomorrow.

Cheers.

Hello all,

As promised, I am sitting in an internet cafe. Of course, internet service ain't as good here as on our side of the pond. So when I get back, I shall regale you with stories of my time from the land of the brown.

Until then, wait. I'll be coming at you from a 21 hour plane ride home soon.

Cheers,
Keeza

I find myself in Detroit at the moment. Sitting in an internet cafe in the airport, wearing very comfortable clothes as I try to eat what I would consider the last solid meal I might have in the next 19 hours.

I doubt there are many people out there who continue to read this since I've failed at posting thus far. But I know that there are a few of you who still faithfully click on my blog when you are bored, so for the few and the brave, I shall endeavor to continue.

I plan on blogging a lot in the next two weeks. I'll wager that almost all of you who read this know that my father passed away on Sunday - something I'm not quite sure that I will get around to writing about anytime soon, but I know it'll have to come out. It's been a long and strange month and it's hard to tell which way is up most of the time.

So here I am, at the airport, awaiting the 19 hour leg between Detroit and Manila. Bringing my dad home is bittersweet and it's hard to believe it's been almost eight years since I've been home. I'm eager to go, yet dreading the eventual emotional storm I fear I will have to weather. But that's life. And the best we can do is go on.

In the meantime, I'm keeping my sense of humor intact. It seems to be the only thing saving me besides the amazing support system of friends that have sustained me this past month. So expect the usual Keeza wit. I'm already thinking of my next post. Airports are great fodder for blogs.

Stay tuned, I'll be back soon. In the meantime, mama's gotta eat some good food before I sit on a plane for almost a day.

Best,
Keez

So I know it's been awhile, but my life has been upended with all the family stuff I'm dealing with. Long story short, my dad is still in the hospital and not doing well, we've had family in from all corners - California and Canada, and besides work and the Philly Fringe, I've been pretty exhausted and finally starting to feel the mental, emotional, and physical fatigue. But we take one day at a time and that's how you survive.

In the meantime, I've found that my problems pale in comparison to what's happening in the Gulf states. And knowing how political I am, I will refrain from my usual soap box rants about the President flying by in a helicopter - hey, at least it only took him two days to get there, that's an improvement from 9/11...

But I'll let this speak for itself. Rather fascinating, no? It's about time the country started to wake up.

Editor and Publisher notes that, "On June 8, 2004, Walter Maestri, emergency management chief for Jefferson Parish, Louisiana; told the Times-Picayune: 'It appears that the money has been moved in the president's budget to handle homeland security and the war in Iraq, and I suppose that's the price we pay. Nobody locally is happy that the levees can't be finished, and we are doing everything we can to make the case that this is a security issue for us.'

It's my birthday so I don't really feel like updating you fully yet. It's been an interesting week and I've discovered how truly wonderful all of my friends are for their support, encouragement, and friendship. Thanks to everyone who has sent best wishes and birthday greetings - you are all wonderful and put a smile on my face!

In the meantime, enjoy this.

Megan had this on her blog a little while ago and I’ve been meaning to do it. Just haven’t gotten around to it yet. So enjoy.

My iTunes Library

How many total songs? 951 songs, 2.5 days, 4.65 GB

Top Most Played Song: It’s actually a tie between two songs I am in the process of writing for the musical mindy. And I are working on – “Expert 1” and “Workshop and Opening Act I” (21 times). Yes, I actually wrote the songs.

Sort by...

Title
First: “And I’ll Never Be Sorry” – another song from the musical I’m writing.
Last: “Your Winter” – Sister Hazel

Time
First: “Towlie” – South Park clip (0:01)
Last: “Rhapsody in Blue” – George Gershwin (16:11)

Artist
First: “Changes vs. Man in the Mirror” – 2Pac – I don’t know that this counts, but it’s what comes up
Last: “Super Mario Medley” – Zaperman (or something like that – this one is really random)

Find "sex", how many songs show up? 6
You Sexy Thing – Barry White
I Wanna Sex You Up – Color Me Badd
Sexual Healing – Marvin Gaye
Sex and Candy – Marcy Playground
Sexual Healing Remix – Shaggy
I’m Too Sexy – The South Park version - pretty funny.

Find "death", how many songs show up? 0

Find "love", how many songs show up? 46 – Oh the Christ – here goes:
Never My Love – Association
Where is the Love (ice remix) – Black Eyed Peas
Where is the Love – Black Eyed Peas
I’ll Make Love to You – Boyz II Men
All for Love – Bryan Adams, Sting, Rod Stewart
Love You Madly – Cake
After All (Love theme from “Chances Are”) – Cher and Peter Cetera
Glory of Love – Peter Cetera
Loves Embrace – Christina Aguilera
I Love Paris – Cole Porter
Friday’s I’m in Love – The Cure
50 Ways to Leave Your Lover – Dave Matthews cover
Baby Love – Diana Ross & the Supremes
Love Potion Number 9 – The Drifters
You Don’t Have to Say You Love Me – Dusty Springfield
Your Song – Elton John (it’s under Love Songs Album or something)
Love Will (Turn Back the Hand) – Grease 2 Soundtrack
Rich Girl – Gwen Stafani (Love.Angel.Music CD)
The Origin of Love – Hedwig and the Angry Inch Soundtrack
Saving All My Love (Live) – Idina Menzel
Mr. Lover – Janet Jackson
Blowin Me Up With Her Love – JC Chasez
I Honestly Love You – Lea Salonga
Working for the Weekend – Loverboy (ha!)
This Love – Maroon 5
She Will Be Loved – Maroon 5
Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me – Mel Carter (Love Sixties CD)
The Game of Love – Michelle Branch
Medical Love Song – Monty Python
That’s the Way Love Goes – N*Sync cover
This Will Be (An Everlasting Love) – Natalie Cole
(I Can’t Live Without Your) Love and Affection – Nelson (That’s right, Matthew and Gunner)
Hey Ya – Outkast (Speakerboxxx/The Love Below CD)
The Way You Move - Outkast (Speakerboxxx/The Love Below CD)
Feelin’ Love – Paula Cole
Baby I Love Your Way – Peter Frampton
Seasons of Love – Rent Original Broadway Cast Soundtrack
Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow – The Shirelles
Isn’t She Lovely – Stevie Wonder
Seasons of Love – Stevie Wonder version
Stop! In the Name of Love – The Supremes
Love Don’t Come Easy – The Supremes
Saving All My Love For You – Whitney Houston
You Give Good Love – Whitney Houston
The Greatest Love of All – Whitney Houston
In Love With A Stripper – Wyclef Jean

Okay.

I realize it’s been over a month since I last blogged. For this I am very sorry. But I believe I have good reason.

So this one will be long because I fully intend to update you all fully. I just am having trouble trying to keep it all straight in my head.

Alright. I’ll just go for it.

1. New Link Added!

Volansky, as evidenced by previous posts and in a number of luminous articles by everyone that matters, is the Goddess of my Idolatry. And she has stared a blog. I encourage you to click – and see why she rocks so damn hard.

2. I Got My Jeep Back!

It only took a month and a half. And they only made one mistake – which isn’t bad considering they basically had to put the entire car back together. When I asked what they didn’t touch, the guy said, “Um, basically from the doors back. But not even, we had to fix some of the doors. Otherwise the rest of it is brand-new.” Suhweet. As for the one mistake – I have windshield wipers on the front and back of my car. When I go to try to clean the front window, I’m supposed to pull the lever towards me for the mist. When I pull, the mist goes off in the rear window. When I push the button for the rear mist, the front mist goes. It’s actually pretty amusing. But they are going to fix it. I was so confused the first time – it was like getting the car brand new all over again. But I’m happy my baby is back.

3. Vacation, all I ever wanted!

We went on our annual trek to North Kackalacki again. Seven miles up the beach in an amazing house – sure, there were a couple of problems with the house – like no air conditioning on the third floor until Wednesday, a broken bathroom door that three of us were sharing, and a luke-warm hot tub. But really, who cares when you’re on vacation up the beach, nobody really around for miles, good food and drink, and most importantly, good company? We played Dance Dance and Karaoke Revolutions, we beached, we wave jumped, I rented a boat to take out on the water, we luke-warm tubbed it, we played board games, we listed to music, we drank, we watched movies – and we had fun. I don’t know that I can ever ask for a better vacation that that. For fun quotes, click on the link to the Cardboard Box’s Blog – it’s all there. That’s some fun you can shake a stick at.

4. I bought a time share!

I did! In Williamsburg. I spent a pretty penny. The next day…

5. I cancelled my time share!

It was a really sweet deal, but I don’t think I’m ready at this point in my life for that. I still have car and education to pay for – and an education I hope to have in the future. So no time-shares, just give me North Kackalacki and I’m cool.

6. It was still a free vacation.

So Fabs and I took advantage of it, went to Busch Gardens for free and rode all the rides – I was afraid I was too old for that stuff. I’m not. It was soo much fun. And we had an amazing time. The free hotel room was connected to an IHop and we had a whirlpool in our bathroom - which prompted a trip to the Big K for bubble bath. The next day we went to Monticello to check out good ‘ol TJ’s hizzy. We’re dorks, but we love that shit. Next time, we’ll do Montpelier.

7. I passed this sign twice in a month. I still laugh when I see it. Ha.

8. July 4th in Philly with Tony Danza?

Lindsay, Brian, and I went to Volansky’s on July 4th and went to the free concert. No, we didn’t go to Live 8 – everyone keeps asking. But we went to Elton John’s free concert. We saw Brian Adams. And Patti LaBelle. And Rufus Wainwright. And then the man himself came on. It was great – we were just standing there, having a good time (and yes, it was hot as hell and standing was annoying after a while, but once Elton came on, I didn’t notice anymore). I could see for most of it. Until Elton came on. Then this was my view:



Dick.

All night, we kept shouting, “Tiny!” Who doesn’t love Tiny Dancer? And he actually played it! And then one of the girls in the group said, “Ever notice how it sounds like he’s singing ‘Tony Danza?’” I’ll never hear the song again without thinking in my head, “Hold me closer, Tony Daaanzaaa.” Damn.

9. I MET ANI DIFRANCO!!!! I CAN DIE NOW.

So a while back, Sarah and I got tickets to the Ani DiFranco show in Wilmington this past week. Lindsay and Brian were going to come, but at the last minute, we had to change plans. So I gave the tickets to Siobhain and Dickert – it had recently been both of their birthdays. So I was happy to finally give them the chance to see Ani live – and front row balcony, too. So we went. Erin McKeown opened. She is amazing. Then the ‘Lil Folksinger herself came on and it was one of the most memorable shows I’ve seen her do. She did a lot of my favorite songs – As Is, Your Next Bold Move, Subdivision, Shameless, Studying Stones, Overlap – I can’t remember all of them, but it was a great concert. Afterwards, we noticed her tour bus behind the venue. There was a small crowd of about ten of us and we waited for almost two hours. Before she came out, the cops tried to kick us out. The Righteous Babe staff and her road crew told us to stay – they made sure we got to see her. Then one of her people came out and explained that she didn’t like pictures and couldn’t sign autographs because she had tendonitis – she was really sorry, but we could at least talk to her. No problem.

I wish I had met her years ago when she was cool with all of that, but I understood. So she came out, all unassuming and right up and chatted with us. I know I said something stupid. But she was smiling, told us how employees at Whole Foods can’t have dyed hair or piercings – this was because someone mentioned her dreads were gone and her hair was now purple. She looked over at me. I said, “Hey, thanks for playing Subdivision – I love that song – I’m from Syracuse, so I know exactly what you’re talking about.” She smiled and was like, “Yeah! That’s cool.” She put up her fist and leaned back and said, “Homestate.” I said, “Yeah, thanks – you were amazing and I heart you.” She said, “Cool. Thanks a lot.” There was some little chatter, but right after that, she pretty much got on her tour bus and drove away. So I met her. I did.

10. Congress Does Yet Another Dumb Thing.

I find the title of this section humorous and incredibly sad at the same time.

I will get on my soapbox soon – this is nothing. It’s been a while since I ranted, but I will leave that for the next post or so when I do more research. Yes, I do fact checking before I open my mouth. So there.

But you know, all of us thought this Energy bill was going nowhere. At the Ani concert, she told us how the day before they were in DC and the went to their Congressman’s offices and went to the hearing on the energy bill and “they gave [her] a mic and a podium and everything.” She ripped into them about what the energy bill was about to do – give billions of dollars in tax breaks to the oil and energy companies, create new nuclear facilities – and on top of that, they don’t know what to do with all of the nuclear waste as it is. So the bill allows them to put nuclear waste on trains and transport the waste through the country – think of all of those cities and villages and sleepy towns NUCLEAR WASTE will be traveling through - it’s destination? A Native American site/reservation in Utah.

WHAT THE HELL?!

This passed with an enormous amount of support. I was pretty pissed when I found out that the CAFTA vote came down to 2 VOTES in the House but this energy bill is outrageous. This is the type of thing that makes me so damn angry. They’re up all night, writing the bill, changing it – who wants to bet money that this 1,700+ page bill, amended at he 11th and 12th hours wasn’t read by a majority of the Congressman? I’ll bet the farm. And whatever is left of my Social Security – with this f*@!ing Administration running the helm and Congressmen kissing ass to them, my guaranteed benefit is as good as gone – these bastards have a way of getting their shit passed with no one blinking an eye.

When did America fall asleep? WHEN???!!! When will it wake up and realize that we are getting the golden shaft?!

Let me quickly break down the basics:
-This bill is basically one big tax break. Electric utilities will see a saving of $3.1 billion, the Coal Industry will see a savings of $2.9 billion, and the Oil and Gas Companies will see a whopping $2.7 billion saved over the next ten years.
-The bill has little or no impact on gas prices. So the President, when asked how to lower gas prices, has pointed to this stalled legislation had to concede that this bill will do nothing to gas prices, wanna know what the reaction was? A big fat nothing. No one has bothered to make the connection that the President was – once again – talking out of his ass. Or Karl Rove’s. Hard to tell.
- The bill won’t necessarily prevent another blackout. It makes them more accountable. And encourages investments in nuclear energy and the construction of power plants, like I said above. So it naturally begs the question – how will this connect to Homeland Security and the Patriot Act now that we have decided to give them the green light to create more terrorist targets…er, I mean, how are we going to be sure these facilities are secure?

And, my friends, if this doesn’t already piss you off, I’m sure this will:
At the 11th hour, they added $1.5 billion in research funds to help oil and gas companies in the Texas district of none other than House majority leader, Tom DeLay. (Time Magazine, August 8, 2005)

Pissed now? Thought so.

11. I’m slow to the take on politics because it has been a difficult week.

I am putting in a rare personal note in this blog post. I ask for your good thoughts and prayers – my father is in the hospital and he’s doing well, but not out of the woods yet. I’m just happy and fortunate that they were here and not home in Syracuse when it happened so that I can be here. Since my cousin just got a job in Dover, he’s here, too – so it’s good we’re all together. It’s always times like these when I forget how strong and formidable my mother is – how wonderfully resilient, brave, and graceful she is in times of duress. So there are good things along with the bad, but just say a good word for him when you get a chance, will you? Everyone has been so amazing – and for those of you who have offered support, time, and anything I need in the past week – and if you read this blog – thank you. It means a lot.

So on that note, I leave you. Thanks for reading – and checking up on it. Because I have been bad at this lately, but I hope to get better.

Coming up: Trips to Albany and Wisconsin and my 26th birthday next week – I will write soon!

Take care of yourself. And others.

-Keeza

Okay. I have found myself once again lacking in my blogging duties. So in no particular order (well, maybe in order of when it happened from earliest to most recent), here's what's happening with me. It's long. So read when you are either a.) bored as balls; b.) procrastinating; or c.) have absolutely nothing better to do.

THE JEEP ACCIDENT UPDATE:

So yes, I have begun the motions of contesting the claim. I'll explain further, keep reading.

I AM PERSONALLY INJURED
Turns out that when I went to my regularly scheduled Chiropractic appointment, the doctor was like, "Wait, whoa. You were in a car accident? Well, we need to run some tests before I adjust you, let's check everything out."

Turns out that my lower back is almost doubly worse than when I first walked into his office three weeks before the accident and that my neck, which is supposed to be slightly curved and in a straight line, is not curved much at the base and not in a straight line head on. Neat.

So he says to me, "You need to call the insurance company and start a personal injury claim. Your HMO won't let me throw all my tools at you to help you out, but the auto insurance will because it's stemming from the accident - you weren't this bad when you first walked in."

Indeed, I've been in my lumbar pain and upper back and neck stiffness in the past two weeks.

So now I get three massages a week to work on my sore muscles before my adjustment.

Rough, I know.

But I'm in so much pain, it's helping a lot.

RETAINING A LAWYER
My chiropractor then suggested an attorney for me to speak with. So I explain the whole thing, he asks a few questions and then says, "Well, I believe that we have enough to reverse the blame. In fact, I'm fairly sure you have a very very good shot."

Neat.

So I ask him how much this will set me back. He asks, "You got my name from your chiropractor, right? Are you injured?"

I explain the x-rays and my lower back and neck.

"Well," he answers, "I'm sure we'll get the blame off of you based on the pictures and from what happened that then we'll move to a personal injury claim. It's my hope that you won't have to worry about me once we settle."

I guess I'm suing someone. Yippie-kai-yay. I'm torn. But if it means that I might have a shot at paying off some debts or even part of my car, then I suppose I will give it a shot.

THE DAMAGE
Based on what they could see, the damage to my vehicle is over a cool $5,300. When they start tearing it apart, they might find more, along with extensive damage to the underside of the passenger side when I went over the boulder. They thought it would take two weeks to fix. It took a week and a half to get the parts. So I won't get the baby back anytime soon.

I HAVE PROOF
So besides working the accident out logistically in my head and remembering everything that happened, it turns out that I have proof. Not only is the Rascals owner providing me with the pictures he took that morning (he was utterly and speechlessly surprised that I was the one ticketed because he knew the guy hit me in the shoulder - ha!), but I took pictures with my trusty cellphone of the skid marks still visible in the shoulder. Take a quick look below. You can see where he hit me - where the tracks overlap. And they are clearly in the shoulder, not in the lane.


If you look really hard, you can see the skids. Keep looking.

WANNA KNOW WHAT'S FUNNY ABOUT BEING TICKETED IN THIS ACCIDENT?
Not too damn much. But we're talking about me here. I managed to find something bladder bustingly funny when I took a closer inspection of the ticket from the Trooper.

Turns out that I'm White! And a Hispanic Female!

Under Race, she checked "White." Under Ethnicity, she checked "Hispanic."

I suppose that one could make the argument that since I am a Filipina that because the Spanish invaded my country for 300 years, that might make me Hispanic. Hell, my last name before I took my step-fathers was Spanish. My great-grandmother used to speak primarily in Spanish?

Or you could just ask me. Because I understand. I get it a lot. Just don't make assumptions. It makes an ass out of you and

...umption.

Moving on.

SKETCHY McSKETCHERTON
So this dude that I hit. Not even his car. Registered to someone else. I don't know who it is. Can't even tell if it's a he or a she based on the name the Trooper supplied me with.

But he's totally Sketchy McSketcherton now.

Today - two weeks after the accident - almost at the exact time I filed the claim after the accident - I call the insurance company to make sure everything is kosher, I don't have to fill out anything, etc. Since they did such a bang-up job with my personal injury claim (that's a long story that doesn't need repeating). And she tells me that the dude-that-hit-me's insurance company closed his end of the claim.

I'm confused. She explains.

"Well, according to the file, he hasn't contacted the company since the accident and the insurance company can't get a hold of them. So they closed the claim."

Buhscuse me?

So I pull out my Accident Folder (I'm anal retentive) and relay all the information on him as I can. The Trooper supplied us both with each other's information. And apparently I'm the only one who has it, not even the insurance company.

So...

It somewhat makes me nervous, but not really. Because I am doing everything I'm supposed to. If - no - WHEN I get the fault in this accident overturned, the insurance company can go after their insurance company for all they've got. I refuse to pay more in my insurance because I GOT HIT. I refuse to get points added to my license because I GOT HIT. And hell, I'm not paying a deductible because I'M NOT AT FAULT.

So that is what's happening with my accident. Craziness.

FENG SHUI FOR THE COMPUTER WIDOW

So the last show of The Cardboard Box Collaborative's inaugural season came and went. And it was fun. It was not without its share of mishaps, but in the end, everyone who came to see it really enjoyed it. We got some KICK-ASS karaoke in and managed to go to the sauna unintentionally (the place had no air-conditioning). On top of it, we made new friends, got to eat sushi all the time, and learned some new things. And we laughed. Much. And often. And really, that's all that is necessary for a good experience.

I OFFICIALLY MISS NEW YORK

So after being kidnapped by Jessica a few weeks ago after the Coro Dinner, I came to the realization that I really am absolutely not done with the Big Apple yet.

See, I was worried that I might be. That I would never want to go back. But no worries, my New York friends that read this - if any of you do. Because I miss the city like I would miss my arm if it was cut-off from me. This much has become apparent to me - and more.

SHOWING THE GIRLS AROUND MY HOME
But let me explain the last time I was in NYC - just last week - with my coworkers.

So being a gracious host, I found it difficult to call everyone that I wanted to when I was in the City. For this, I apologize to anyone that I didn't get to see - and it was a many people. It was just so crazy and hectic - and in trying to make sure that my coworkers were having a good time - I just plum found it hard to connect with everyone I wanted to. I will change this though, since I plan to go up and only see the people that I haven't yet.

But anyway, I digress.

A month or so ago, my coworkers and I spent an unholy amount of money for these fantastic seats to the Yankees/Pittsburgh game. We're talking behind home plate. Yeah.

So Jackie wanted to get a hotel room. I decided that after spending that much money on the tickets that I should try to find someone willing to put up three people. I very soon decided against that - didn't want to overburden anyone with three bodies taking up space in their apartment. So I offered to use my Hilton Honor Points from Iowa and Seattle that I racked up.

So we booked a free hotel room the night before the game so that we could really enjoy ourselves. The hotel was SWEET. Embassy Suites in Battery Park, right across from the Irish Hunger Memorial. Amazing. And highly recommended for people who want to find a nice hotel in Manhattan.

HOTTER THAN BALLS UNDER THE STARS
A few days before leaving, I got an email from my good friend, Mai. Turns out she had VIP tickets to "Broadway Under the Stars." So I readily accepted.

We sat very close to the stage on a huge blanket, enjoying cheese and wine. Christina Applegate looked fantastic. We didn't know some of the songs (it was a tribute show with Broadway Men as the theme) but we had a good time anyway.

It was also ridiculously hot and humid and no breeze and thousands of New Yorkers. You know what I mean. We were sweating just sitting there. It might have been the wine. But it was hot.

In fact, during the first number, the lights went out. I thought something might be wrong. They were filming it for broadcast later in the week. The Rockettes kept dancing through the lights being out - we could see what they were doing. Afterwards, Christina was like, "Wasn't that great? Let's see that again!"

We all laughed.

And then she said, "No, seriously. As you can see, the lights have gone out, so we're going to need to redo that so that we can re-film. So hang tight."

So we did. We were all talking amongst ourselves. Christina was still on stage. Someone shouted, "Dance, Christina!" She shuffled a did a little step. Clearly, all of them on stage were laughing and having a good time. Someone in the crowd yelled, "Kelly Bundy!" She didn't seem to respond. Someone yelled, "I love you, Christina!" She replied, "I love you back" into the microphone.

I was rapidly searching my brain. See, I heart Christina Applegate because I heart "The Sweetest Thing." That movie cracks me up - and her especially. So I was trying to find a line that she said for me to shout out to her so that she would recognize a "Sweetest Thing" fan. I wanted to yell, "Look, it's Jesus!" but I was afraid I'd offend someone. Then I was about to yell, "What's up with you?" When the lights went back on.

So a few days later, I mention this to some friends who heart the movie and ask for things I should have shouted out. It took us a while. We had to find the right quote that wasn't too crazy or vulgar to yell. It was Narco who finally hit, "Do we have time for a movie montage?"

Damn. I should have thought of that. Oh well. I'll just have to see Sweet Charity and try it when she comes out of the stage door.

I FORGOT HOW NON-EXPENSIVE SOME PLACES IN NEW YORK ARE WHEN YOU'RE DRINKING
In my accident week, all I wanted was a drink. I didn't have one until after Broadway Under the Stars. We decided to go to a place close to Bryant Park with air conditioning. One of the former Coro's suggested a place his friends work at. So we went.

Three shots and four or five drinks later, I was ready to head back to the hotel with Jackie and Sarah. Needless to say, all of us were feeling just fine. We had enough sense to call the front desk for a late check out. And late check out we did.

We checked out at 1:30 in the afternoon, grabbed brunch at Lalo's and got stuck in traffic showing the girls around the town. We parked in a garage and headed to the 4 at 86th Street.

THE BRONX BOMBERS AND HAPPINESS
To cap the end to a very trying week, I was elated to go to the Yankees game. Especially with the seats we had. It was me and Jackie and Sarah and my good friend, Vivian (from my McCall days and just a big a Yankee fan as I am).

I think I almost cried when we came through the tunnel to get to our seats. It was amazing. We were in the VIP section where they served food to you. Sure, I spent an arm and a leg and had to wait until the 6th inning to get my food, but really, it was fantastic.

I won't say too much. I'll let the pictures speak for themselves. This is how freaking close we were. We watched Mussina pitch a complete shut-out, Matsui hit a home run in the first inning, Giambi turn the jeers into cheers with a double hit, A-Rod warming up, Derek Jeter just being there, Sheffield's crazy waving bat, Robbie Cano stroke one to the outfield, Posada doing his thing, and Tino Martinez come into the game. Even Ruben Sierra made an appearance. It was AMAZING. I don't think that I can ever go to Yankees Stadium again. Because I'm going to want those seats everytime. Someday...


The view from our seats.


A-Rod warming up.


Taking the field.


Derek Jeter.


A-Rod on deck.


I heart you, Tino Martinez!


Finally, the girls. Me, Jackie, Sarah, and Vivian.

That is my update. I hope you've enjoyed it. Please keep coming back. I will be much better at this. At the least, I will try once a week. Cheers.

THE SHITTIEST MONDAY IN RECENT MEMORY

So coming off of our opening weekend for Feng Shui in Philly, I found myself having the shittiest Monday in recent memory.

You see, it's just a little over a year to the day that I traded in my old Donkey (Subaru Impreza) for a 2003 pretty-damn-near-new Jeep Liberty I have named "The Gorilla" (you can ask me why in the comments).

This would all be fine and good.

Except that I got into a car accident today.

My baby is broken.

It was 9:30 in the morning and I was coming back from Lindsay's with Hucklebees - literally less than three miles away from my house. I was going to drop off the cat and my bags and go straight into work.

Well I'm at the turn to get into my neighborhood - a turn I've made hundreds of times. And as I'm approaching, I notice there's an unusual amount of traffic going north on Route 13, which is what I have to crossover to get into my neighborhood.

Route 13 is a three lane road. It's like a big boulevard - cement dividers between north and south - and special turn-offs for u-turns or left turns. You get the idea.

Anyway, there's a ridiculous amount of trucks and motor homes and trailers attached to trucks coming from the south. Apparently there was a NASCAR race in Dover I was unaware of. Either way, it made for a lot of traffic.

Now generally speaking, most Delaware drivers find themselves on the wrong side of dumb, as Narco would say. I was waiting at the stop sign to go straight across Route 13 for maybe ten minutes. Seriously. I was behind this woman who was making a left turn. Cars were waving her to go. She wouldn't. So I pull up along side of her on her right - many of us do this when we are trying to go straight at this stop sign when we are behind someone going left. If she wasn't going to take advantage of the nice people waving her through, I sure as hell was going to.

Now I should mention that there's a stop light about 100 yards to my right. Basically, the traffic going north on 13 was stopped at this red light and these cars noticed we were trying to either go straight or make a left turn and to their credit, were leaving us space to go. So I slowly start to go forward. I'm giving the obligatory wave to the two cars who have stopped and as I approach the trailer attached to the truck in the third row farthest away from the stop sign and closest to the street I was trying to get onto, I hesitated for a second. I inched forward for a second, counted to three, and then hit the gas gently to get past the truck.

It was at this point that there was suddenly a loud thud and my wheel went to the right. Realizing I was in the process of getting hit, I jerked the steering wheel to the left a little. My reflexes were good, except that I ended up hitting the gas a bit instead of the brake. In hindsight, this was a good thing and I'll explain that. But at the time, I ended up going over a nicely landscaped curb, felt the jeep going over a boulder in the nicely landscaped curb, and trying desperately not to hit the street sign or the "Rascals" sign for the restaurant that shares this curb. Turns out I landed just into a soft patch on the grass, but plummeted my car right before the landscaping got to include bushes and more rocks.

Now I'm pretty shaken, I turn to check on the cat, who is okay - turn off my car, grab my insurance, and walk out of the car. The driver of the other car is pretty shaken. His airbag had deployed and he was a little confused. I asked if he was okay. After he said yes, I started to call 911. A guy walked over to us and asked if we were okay - he had heard the crash from down the street and ran to make sure no one was hurt. That was nice of him. He stayed for a little bit to make sure we were okay.

It's at this point I realize the other driver has bruises along his arm and a cut knee. The impact of him hitting the airbag must have been pretty hard.

It's also at this point that I look at the front of my car. You'll see pictures below. My heart sank. I was also a little pissed. I could only think of my insurance at the cost, I'll have to admit.

It's fixable, though. I think.

So to make a very long story short, the state troopers didn't come for about an hour or so. So I sat there with the other driver. He was okay. He was from Philly. He was trying to call his daughter to pick him up. He was very nice. We agreed it was just an accident - we didn't see each other over the trailer - hey, shit happens. He said he wasn't going to sue me or anything. I said "Thanks." I should have said "I won't either." But I'll get to that.

So the trooper finally gets there to take all of our information. This is where the story gets bogged down in details. What is important is that I told her the story as I told all of you just now - a truncated version, though. Basically, he was in the lane closest to us and I had hesitated, I thought I had it clear and the next thing I knew, I was on this grassy and landscaped embankment.

The Rascals owner came out and took pictures and then told me that the county has enough to put a light there, they just won't. And he doesn't care about the property, he cares about people getting hurt. Apparently, two years ago, I guy flipped over his car and two weeks ago, some guy moved a huge bolder twenty feet with his car for the same reason. So he was saying that he was glad everyone was okay and that they need to put a traffic light there because it was so dangerous - it happened all the time.

Um.

So she takes the info as I'm calling my insurance and all that blah crap. She calls two tow trucks - very necessary. Had I slammed on my brakes at impact, I might have flipped over the Jeep. Okay. So I'm at least alive and fine. Then I get really upset. Why?

Because the other driver said he was in the lane, not on the shoulder. Which is an understandable mistake - people use that shoulder all the time as a lane. He had mentioned to me that he had pulled off to get a hot dog at the place next to rascals on his way home.

Of course, he had no cash and no cards on him, so I don't know how he was going to accomplish such a thing, but this is another story.

So I am the one who is at fault, according to the trooper. Failure to yield at a stop sign. Which is crap since I was stopped at it for ten minutes and was going because the cars had waved me through. This, of course, does not occur to me until the tow truck arrives and after Jackie and Sarah pick me and Hucklebee up and I'm at home and starting to piece it all together again.

I get a $50 fine. I had started to piece it together when the trooper was there, I asked her if the lane closest to us was a lane or a shoulder. She said a shoulder. Okay. I didn't quite put it together, but I was pretty damn sure at that moment that he was in the shoulder and not the lane.

I ask her about points on the license. She says it might be one or two points. She is really apologetic - she didn't want to have to place blame in the situation - at least that's the feeling I got. She said, "You don't have any points on your license, do you?" I said, "No. I've been in very very small accidents before this and no points were given." She looked really sympathetic and shrugged and said, "I'm really sorry."

So here's my dilemna: I am pretty damn sure that my account is correct. I very clearly remember waving to two cars in the first two lanes because I did it after I had passed the first car and wondered if the first car saw me. I was slowing down past the truck. If I'm correct, that's three lanes. In which case, I was blindsided on the shoulder. I've driven the damn thing so many damn times, been in the exact same situation and I know that once I get past the third car, I'm in the clear.

So do I contest this? I think that on principle, I need to. At the least, to impart the importance of putting a goddamned traffic light there. But here's the sticky part: it's my word against his.

Because no one - not one - in that long line of traffic - who saw the accident stopped. Not one of them stepped forward as a witness - no one even rolled down a window to see if we were okay. Tell me that I'm not crazy when I think that this is pretty damn egregious.

The only guy who stopped was a guy who heard the accident down the street - he never saw it. The Rascals guy was taking pictures of his property. And the guy who stopped had said, "You know, this is just an accident, but they'll probably tag the blame on you."

Right. I understand that. The other driver had the right of way. Or did he? If he was driving on the shoulder, did he have the right of way? If other cars stop to let me pass, I understand I have to be careful in the cross, but in a three lane highway where I had successfully passed three cars, is it my fault?

Thoughts? Comforting thoughts? Jesus. I'm just sitting here thinking through this logically and trying to apply some of my legally-conscious mind to it.

In the meantime, AFSCME came through in the clutch and got me a rental car the very same evening. At least I have that.

And my poor, poor gorilla is going to be appraised and then worked on. Oh, and it's not just body damage, apparently, the impact I had on the rock not only killed the front tire and probably the axle, but it also knocked something else out because there was oil and fluid leaking from my car when the guy towed it out. I just hope it's fixable and that they can get it back to where it once was. I am paying waaay too much money for this car to have it look like a piece of shit, I'll pay off that deductible some way.

I'm so not happy. Please tell me this isn't a sign of the week to come. It's only Monday.


Good thing my cellphone has a camera. I remembered it about thirty minutes after the accident. But this is pretty much it.


This is where my car came to rest.


Even got part of my passenger door. I can't open it all the way. Scratches along the passenger side all the way to the rear wheel. This is going to cost me a fortune.


Notice the wheel. Smashed.


Getting towed off of the embankment.


This is the last view I got of my car before I left. Sad.

Send happy thoughts. I'd appreciate it.

Wow. That's all I have to say. Wow.

it's hard to believe this month has flown by, but I can't say that I'm upset about it. It's been one thing after another and I guess for anyone who actually checks into this thing, the latest thing I can say is that I'm good. Busy as all hell, but feeling quite good.

The thing is, I've been running around this state, between here and Maryland, between here and New York, and between here and Philly. And yes, I work seven days a week. Call me crazy, but it's the only speed I know. I suppose at some point, my body will stop me from doing such things - as it almost did at the beginning of the month. So, in typical "I haven't written a blog in weeks" fashion, an update on all things fabulous and not in my life:

THE SPRING OF BASEBALL.
Perhaps some of you know, perhaps some of you don't - I happen to be a big fan of America's favorite pastime. As evidenced by posts as the legendary Orioles/Twins game from before - this is truly the spring of baseball. It's funny how it's always when I leave NYC that I tend to watch more baseball. Because it used to be right there in front of me and I suppose part of leaving New York is that at least I get to watch my beloved boys play no matter where I am. Except that I'm in Delaware. Which means that I have to go to Buffalo Wild Wings to watch them play because they're the only place in this state with the YES Network (That's the exclusive Yankees network for those of you that are unaware). The point is, even though I'm a die-hard, dyed-in-the-wool Yankees fan, I have only seen them play once this spring. And until two weeks ago, I was averaging a game a week. I've seen the Phillies, the Cardinals, the Twins, the Orioles - and the Yankees - only once. Something needed to be done. Especially since I've now got my co-workers watching them as often as I am, being the Braves and Cardinals fans that they are - they think the Yanks are hot and I've gotta say that I whole-heartedly agree.

The point is, I plunked down a lot of cash and in two weeks, the three of us are going up to Yankees Stadium and meet up with another die-hard Bronx Bombers fan to watch them in action at the House that Ruth Built - and in the section right behind home plate and close to the Yankee dugout. Excuse me while I take a moment to dance around my room.

Thank you.

I barely get to see them much being down here, but I've managed to keep tabs on most of the games. Which brings me to my next point.

XM RADIO
I caved in and finally bought one last month and I can't get enough of the damn thing. Hell, I bought it so that I could listen to my Yankees no matter where I am. So if you're thinking about spending the money to get one, I highly recommend it. It's possibly one of the most useful things I've bought myself - and I've stopped listening to the conventional radio, which always ruins music for me.

FILLIBUSTER, BOLTON, and BILL FRIST
Yes, I won't wax political or philisophical about this one. Obviously, I grinned as last week ended when I read the words, "Frist cedes control of Senate to Reid" in the Washington Post. But what I will say is this: cooler heads prevailed and in the meantime, I think I finally saw and heard of Senators I had long thought had died. See, the Fillibuster fight would have dictated much of what I do since my job is tied to what happens in the Senate (for obvious reasons I choose not to go into right now). So while working last week, I found myself listening to C-SPAN all week, something even a political animal like myself have never done for hours at a time, and finding it very interesting. Beyond that, not much has changed. Except that even with a Republican majority in both the House, Senate, and White House, we are finally hanging together. It's not quite as much progress as my little liberal beating heart can hope for, but under the circumstances, I'm pretty darn pleased.

WC DEBAUCHERY AND WHERE THE HELL IS MY CELLPHONE CHARGER?
Yet another Washington College graduation gone by. As an older alum who was using graduation weekend as a relaxing break from the hey day of Social Security reform, I decided that instead of going to the bars at all this weekend, I'd stay in with friends and have some down time. So we did.

Stayed at Middle Hall with the crew and didn't leave all weekend. Seriously. I decided that if people wanted to see me, they could get their ass to me since I wasn't going far. Turned out for the better, I think.

We had a WC Happening on the front porch and into the Cater Walk. Brought the guitar and mic along. We played, we laughed, we reminisced. We then decided to play "Fifty Guineas and a Dream" and see if anyone could correctly answer some WC trivia. Turns out we not only know a lot about the history of our college (and we're talking real obscure things), but we can make it fun. I guess that when your college is the only one in the country licensed to use George Washington's name (legally) and you are the 10th college in the nation, there's a lot to ask. Lemme clarify for all of you the title of our trivia game - George Washington himself gave us his name and fifty guineas to start up the college and being the aweomest ever, we have decided that means George gave us fifty guineas and a dream. He also did serve on our Board of Visitors and Governors and left because he became president. Not too shabby.

I digress.

So after many hours of "Fifty Guineas" and a load of drinking whilst doing it, we retreated into one of the rooms where we had the fully stocked bar and proceeded to have a very good time. I made up new concoctions that were lauded by everone. I called them "Monkey Juice" and the even more popular "Monkey Punch" and then it was DOMA time. We initiated two kiddies and before you could say "May Day," it was Sunday and time for mimosas during graduation.

After graduation, we hurried out of the dorm (though not quick enough because I spent over $200 at the bookstore - don't ask) and towards Rock Hall where a co-worker of Lindsay's has a house on the bay. We spent the afternoon staring at the Chesapeake Bay, having a barbecue, driving around in a golf cart, and swimming in the indoor pool before saying our goodbyes to yet another fantastic reunion weekend.

On the drive home, I started thinking and wondering whether or not I had grabbed my cellphone charger out of the dorm before I left. I was only twenty minutes away from the college and almost turned around because I was sure I had. The only thing was that I didn't have a clue as to how to get back in the dorm.

Sure enough, I couldn't find it when I got home. So I've been calling the school and it turns out that they couldn't find it, either.

So what the hell happened to my cellphone charger, dammit?!

I'm still sad. Or pissed. I can't tell the difference.

I'M CROOKED.
Going back to that thing in the beginning of this post, my back hurt me for more than a month straight. And not just a dull little pain, but serious sharp pain. So I started going to a chiropractor. Which has been fantastic. It helps that he's pretty cute, too. But that's neither here nor there. It turns out that I had a group of muscles on one side working against a group of muscles on the other. Also, you're supposed to have these fluid-filled sacs between your vertebrae and after years of chronic pain without any adjustments at all, my lumbar vertebrae sacs are extremely compressed. So this is what the trainers were saying to me in crew. Of course, they didn't fix me at all. So I leave it to my chiropractor to straighten me out. I've been going three times a week and since I started, I'm feeling incredibly better. Progress is steady and my body has begun to make some serious changes to the adjustments. I'm not quite out of the woods yet, things are starting to stay in place and now my spine is correcting, so the pain will sometimes dissapate and then suddenly, it's back again - and spreading to my upper and mid back - but I'm told this is normal. Either way, I'm finally fixing a problem that has been vexing me for most of my life - from the time I was a kid. Funny how no doctors ever fixed it before.

THE ANNUAL CORO DINNER AND FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, I MISS NEW YORK.
I went to the Annual Coro Dinner last week and it was amazing. They had it at the Lighthouse at Pier 61 at Chelsea Piers and it was so incredibly shee-shee-pee-pee-doo-doo. Then again, I did pay a lot of money to go.

The room has these huge windows and being on the pier, the view of the Hudson is fantastic. Walking in, they had these trays of drinks that were splederific and hors d'ourves that were amazing - I'm talking truffles, salmon, crab, stuffed noodles with asparagus. Then the room opened up for the dinner and this year, instead of spreading out Coro alum amongst the tables, they seated all of us together. Which might have been a mistake.

We were so far away from the action that we found ourselves not paying attention at all. Plus, our table had only six people total and the table had settings for at least twelve. There were glasses of wine in front of us. We were lightyears away from the action. So we decided to drink and whisper and send text messages to other alumni at different tables. It was decadent. Dinner was amazing. It was fun.

At one point, we were joined by one of the Fellows in my class and two of her co-workers. Just so happens that she works at NY1 News and one of her guests was a fairly famous newscaster. We made quick friends. I passed her glasses of wine, we drank, we all had a great time at the table. And then we went to the bar with the rest of the alum afterwards.

After one beer, I had to go. Mostly because my car was going to be towed if I let it sit there after 11. So after circling the block and realizing there was no parking whatsoever, me and two alum decided to leave since we didn't feel like paying for parking only to go back into the bar that was hotter than Hades and drink more.

We had an adventure. One of them lived in Brooklyn, so in driving her home, we decided to stop by the apartment of a Coro alum and chum (as I say) that wasn't at the dinner. We hung out there for a while before dropping her off.

Then it was off to Astoria in Queens where I was staying with my friend for the evening. After some chatting, we went to bed. The next morning, I work up so I could move my car and head back. I got a call from my former AFSCME boss in Iowa. So we met for brunch. She kidnapped me. She roped me into going to the NYC labor happy hour that night. What can I say? She really pulled my arm.

Riiight.

So whilst waiting, I decided to run some errands. Went back to the old apartment. Stopped by the bank. Shopped at Modell's for Yankees gear for me and my coworkers for the big game in two weeks. Went to visit a grey area in my life (we all have them - and it was a good time). Went to the happy hour. Had free drinks and food. Met wonderful people. Promised to come back. Left for Delaware.

And in my unexpected extended stay, I realized, with a lot of sadness, just how much I really missed home. I think that's why I have only been going into the city for extremely short periods at a time since I moved (a few hours, a one-night deal) and stopped going altogether. It's too hard to go back. It's the life I left behind. I'm happy where I am, but there's a part of me wishing that I'll get sent back home soon. Because I'm now in that strange place where I know deep down in my heart that I'm going back because I know for a fact that I'm not anywhere near done with New York yet. But it's so strange to go back. Because I don't have a home there to go back to. It's so familiar and a part of me and yet I can't stay because I don't live there anymore. It's familiar and foreign at the same time. It's exciting and the same. It's fun and sad. And it's still strange to know that I lived there and had such an amazing three years there and I can't call it home. It's uplifiting. And it breaks my heart that I am not a part of it everyday. I don't know that I'll ever get over it until I move back. So I guess that's on my "To Do List." Honestly, I don't think it ever came off of it.

FENG SHUI
The Cardboard Box Collaborative's final show of the season is upon us. I wrote one of the monologues in the show. It's going to be fabulous.

As one of the CBC's Artistic Associates and it's resident design/scenic monkey, I have been spending a lot of time on all the stuff for the show in my copious amounts of spare time (i.e. sleep time). So if you can see it, please do. You can check out the link on the right for the show information.

WORK AND OTHER RUMINATIONS
Work has been busy. Which is a good thing. We've been gearing up for this big town hall we had tonight. It turned out to be a cozy crowd, but a crowd nonetheless and we had a great time. So that's good.

I'm still struggling with certain aspects of my work, but that's the challenge in all of it, which is what I love about the work.

I dunno if my mind is playing tricks on me or what, but I'm starting to get strange feelings about work. I love the union and I love AFSCME, there's just other things happening in my environment that I can't put my finger on. i won't go into much detail. I think it's mostly been stress, though it hasn't been usual stress. Either way, my intuition is getting strange signals. I'm going to remain cryptic about this. I have a feeling that my time in New York last week triggered it.

But rest assured that I'm doing exactly what I love and I'm having a good time doing it. I wouldn't change places for the world.

That's my fifteen day update. I have two weeks until the Yankees and three weeks until Castle Connection with my friends in the Outer Banks. So i'm going to love this month. And everything it brings me, good and bad.

And I'll try to check in more often. I promise.